Beneath Guarded Hearts - 75

Previously…

Asma

The ruthless winds blew harder. I could almost feel its piercing ends slashing right through my clothes, and to my horror, my skis started to move, the whirlwind too strong and my weight too light to keep me in place. I was being shoved towards the end of the cliff. I threw my whole body onto the fine, fresh snow that fell nonstop on the steep slope, and I tucked my head between my arms and started praying. I was lost in the middle of a snowstorm, and I had no idea where I was or what to do about it.

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3bdulla

            I panicked, the fear eating at me faster than the seconds passed. There was no sign of her. I screamed out her name, but my only response was a harsher blow of the biting edges of the fierce wind. I couldn’t loose her, I couldn’t even think about loosing her, the thought too dreadful to consider. Not on our honeymoon. I took long turns to make sure I didn’t miss her or pass her by, when I saw something move in the white blurriness of the chaotic blizzard. I skied faster.

Me: “Asma!”

            I heard a faint sound, but I couldn’t make out what it was. My heart lurched when I skied forward and I finally found her, laying on the fresh snow, her head tucked between her arms and her knees pulled up. She shook a little as she rocked back and forth, and I realized that she was praying.

She looked up. I couldn’t see her eyes, masked beneath the mirror of her goggles. I fell to my knees and took her into my arms, hugging her tight, never wanting to let go. The mere thought of having lost her… I couldn’t bare it.

Me: “Yalla, 7bibty. I’ll take you home.”

2 days later…

3alya

            Sul6an hadn’t woken up since the last time I had seen him, had not even flickered his lashes when his eyes were shut. Rashid warned me to stay away, threatened me actually, but I couldn’t stay away for much longer. I sighed.

Rashid: “He just went back to sleep. Get out.”

            I clenched my fists after recovering from my jolt of his sudden appearance. So Sul6an was fine?

Me: “He woke up? Why didn’t you tell me?!”

Rashid: “I think I made that very clear during our last conversation.”

Me: “It’s not for you to decide, yal 7mar!”

Rashid: “He doesn’t want you here, when will you get that?”

            I hated how calm his voice was, how I let my emotions, yet again, destroy the usual composed face I masked everyday.

Me: “You don’t know that!”

Rashid: “You don’t believe me? Then why don’t you ask him yourself?”

            To my unexpectedness, he turned his back towards me and walked out of the room. I was confused until I turned around, and my eyes met a flaring glare from a very conscious Sul6an.

Sul6an

            How dare she show her face? How could she sit there, pretending like she gave a damn about me, when she didn’t? But I knew how. Her father made her. What made me even more furious was that deep down I still wanted her. Even in my anger, my heart raced when I opened my eyes. I noticed the dark circles under her eyes, the delicate curve of her hands resting on top of each other on her lap, her glaring eyes as she faced Rashid. I could have almost believed that she was genuinely concerned about my well being with the act she just put up, but given the circumstances, I couldn’t bring myself to believe a word that escaped her mouth. I blinked my thoughts away. I wished I could get rid of her as easily.

Rashid: “You don’t believe me? Then why don’t you ask him yourself?”

            She turned around and looked at me, and for the first time I saw a new softness in her eyes. But I ignored it. I would not be deceived this time, or any other time for the matter. Before she could even say anything, I blurted out the words that battled in my head.

Me: “What the hell are you doing here?”

            Her eyes darkened and she stiffened.

3alya: “I was actually here to check on you. How are you fee-”

Me: “Just shut up! I don’t want to hear any more lies coming out of you, do you hear me?”

3alya: “Sul6an, just calm down and let me explain..”

Me: “Explain what? There is nothing that you can say that will justify your actions. I did your father a damn favor taking the trouble of babysitting you, and this is how you repay me? This is how you honor your father’s word?”

            I barely heard Rashid rush in.

Rashid: “Sul6an, I can kick her out if you-”

Me: “Get out. Both of you just get out. Get her out of my face.”

            I didn’t realize how angry I was until I felt dizzy from the heated argument, and my eyes started to roll in a blur. I snapped them back to focus and forced myself to watch her leave.

Me: “Don’t ever come back.”

            I hissed through my teeth right before she walked out of the door.

3alya

            Rashid seemed inclined to follow me. He didn’t trust me to respect their privacy? I knew I wasn’t wanted there, Sul6an made that very clear. I forced the tears that strained beneath the surface of my eyes not to fall. My heart was beating so fast, the hurt from his words so shockingly deep. Rashid was still walking silently behind me and my anger rose. But as I turned to glance at him and retort a remark, I saw that he was just as shocked as I was at Sul6an’s reaction. He ran his fingers through his hair, his expression aggravated.

Me: “I know where the exit is. You don’t need to walk me to the door.”

            He blinked and looked me, as if he was unaware that he was following me. He turned around and strode away, and I made sure that I was out of his sight before I turned to one of the nurses.

Me: “Excuse me? My friend is in room 364 and he’s just had an operation. He asked me to observe his actions before and after the surgery, but the visiting hours are very limited and his research depends on this. Could you please record what he says and does on tape? Without his knowledge of course, that would just ruin his project.”

            She eyed me suspiciously, but before she could start questioning me, I slipped a thick pack of folded 500Dhs notes into her hands.

Me: “You would be doing me and Mr. Sul6an a huge favor.”

            I gave her a warm smile, trying to conceal the pain that I couldn’t ignore as Sul6an’s words echoed needles into my head. I smiled at her nod.

Nurse: “Sure madam, anything for Mr. Sul6an.”

To be continued…