Beneath Guarded Hearts - 41

Previously…

3bdulla

Asma: “This is too extreme!”

Rashid: “Extreme situations call for extreme measures.”

Asma: “Ufffff I HATE YOU!”

She suddenly turned around and stormed in the opposite direction of Rashid. Only, that direction was where I was standing. Before my mind could register what was going on, a trembling body hit my chest, and I was staring into the watery eyes of Asma’s shocked and dread-filled face.

__________________

Asma

            Oh no. Please let it be someone else, anyone but 3bdulla! But even in the darkness, I knew it was him. I found myself dumb-struck for one moment, and in the next I was crying. In front of him. I never thought I would allow myself to be so weak, to let my guard down that much. I never wanted him to see me like this, weak, vulnerable… absolutely helpless. I didn’t want him to see how much I needed him. I never really knew I did until that very moment. I wanted him to hug me and tell me that he would fix everything, and let me cry onto his chest as he soothed me. But none of that happened. He took two robotic steps back, and just when I thought he would abandon me… well, he did. He turned around and simply walked away. He WALKED AWAY! I stared after him with disbelieving eyes, his form descending into the shadows of this dark night.

Me: “3a.. 3bdulla?”

            I choked on my words, my body shocked in place. I shuddered as long arms crept up on me and hugged me from behind.

Rashid: “Don’t be mad, Asma. I’m trying to make this work. You know I don’t have a choice. I don’t want to be like this, to force decisions on you. But… well, better you than me I guess.”

            Just when I started to take the slightest comfort in his words, I stiffened at his last phrase.

            But for once, I didn’t push him away. I didn’t growl at his face. I simply let him hold me, because for once, I couldn’t possibly offer myself comfort without someone’s help. And apparently, he was the only one willing to do the honors.

            After what seemed ages, he whispered something into my ear.

Rashid: “I know you love him, Asma.”

Me: “No I don’t.”

            I said it too quickly. I forced myself to say it again, and maybe if I kept saying it my mind would actually believe it. It was convincing my heart that was the problem.

            I heard him sigh, and he turned me around.

Rashid: “I’ve seen the way you look at him, like he’s some sort of angel. Well, he’s not.”

Me: “I know. I think I’ve known all along…”

            I wasn’t talking to anyone specifically, just mumbled quiet words that dissolved into thin air.

            I felt his hands gently shake his grip on my shoulders.

Rashid: “Asma… Look at me.’

            I forced myself to meet his gaze.

Rashid: “Admit it.”

Me: “Admit what?”

Rashid: “You know what.”

Me: “Why is it so important to you?”

            I didn’t have the energy to start a fight, only answered him in jumbled-up whispers.

Rashid: “Just answer me.”

            Even though his tone was gentle, he was demanding, anxious to hear my answer. Dare I say I noticed a tiny flicker of hope in his eyes? Who was this Rashid in front of me?

            When I gave him no answer, he suddenly let go. And the Rashid I knew was back.

Rashid: “Tell everyone about us, or I will. Maba 7rmty tkoon mft6’7a mny. You will show me off with pride. Understand?”

            I nodded mindlessly, and he started to walk away, when I heard myself calling him back.

Me: “Rashid?”

            He turned around, briefly assessing me, and decided better of leaving. I realized I was a complete mess. My make-up was smeared, my shaila was undone, and my posture was slouched. He suddenly took long steps towards me and stood right in front my face, forcing me to look up to match his gaze. We were too close, but I made no motion to move.

Rashid: “I’m sorry Asma. I know you think that I stole your life and most importantly the person you think you love. But-”

            I interrupted him, placing the tip of my finger on his lip. I stood on my toes, stretching as far as my length would allow, and bent to give him a light kiss on his cheek. He was taken by surprise, too surprised to say anything, and so I took the chance and told him the lie I had practiced saying for a while now.

Me: “You don’t need to apologize. I never loved him; he’s just a crush, a distant memory that will fade within time. Hhhh, teenagers la?”

            I gave out a broken laugh, my throat still aching to release the tension of the tears I was holding back.

Me: “I’ll try to be more… willing. I know I haven’t made it easy for you. But since we’re both stuck we might as well try to tolerate each other la?”

            I gave him a weak smile, and he grinned back devilishly into my face.

Rashid: “I’m still sorry.”

Me: “For what?”

            I narrowed my eyes as I saw the glint of an evil gleam in his eyes.

Rashid: “For this.”

            He suddenly put his arms around me, surrounding me in his warmth, and his lips crushed mine with gentle brushes. I was appalled but amazed at the same time, my legs locked into place. I didn’t know what to do; I just stood there as he kissed me under the moonlight. I realized I wanted to enjoy it, to take pleasure in it so much that I would forget 3bdulla for just a little while, to escape his torturous grip on my heart, to make him seem like a mere shadow in the back of my mind that I would never approach again. But the exact opposite happened. I found myself wishing it was 3bdulla, and my heart tightened in painful beats.

            I pushed at him vigorously before my mind lingered on unwanted thoughts, but he didn’t seem to feel the pressure of my hands on his solid chest. His heartbeat was fast. He was aroused. He wouldn’t… But no, he clearly said the other day… But would he?

            I suddenly pushed harder, confusion being replaced by utter fear. But he only seemed to grip me closer, not wanting to break any contact. I tried to wriggle away, but that seemed to only excite him more, as if I had encouraged him. I was absolutely appalled. I would rather have died than face Rashid in his monstrous phase again. Tears sprung down my eyes as he held me in a powerful grasp, kissing down my throat and lingering at the curve where my neck met my shoulder.

Me: “Rashid… STOP!”


Rashid: "Shhhh... Let me show you real pleasure..."


Me: "Rashid... Laa2... Rashid!"

            My voice was muffled, a bare whisper to his ears. Nothing would stop him now. Nothing except…

3bdulla: “Asma, Wainch? Everyone’s looking for you and- WHAT THE HELL?! NOT AGAIN!”

            Except my hero.

3bdulla: “WHAT’S GOING ON?”

Rashid: “Ufff go away can’t you see we’re busy?”

            3bdulla’s voice magically seemed to break through his ‘excitement’.

Me: “3bdulla! SA3IDNYY!”

3bdulla: “GOM 3ANHA YOU PERVERT!”

            I was panting frantically, gasping for air. Rashid held me in front of him just enough to look into my eyes.

Rashid: “Ysa3dich? He’s the one who left you all alone with me. So now he’s going to suffer the consequences.”

Me: “Wha-”

            My words broke into a gasp, which formulated into a scream as Rashid literally picked up my whole body and tossed me over his shoulder. And then he ran. No one had to tell me what was going on. I knew, and the fear shivered its way all over my body…

I was being kidnapped.

To be continued…